glimpse

Oh Ev...

2011-09-14T10:23:00.000-07:00

Have you met my boyfriend? HE is really sweet and really really cute!

He is 19 months old now, talking more and more everyday. He is gentle and loving and always has a hug if you need one.

This is definitely worthy of breaking my silence!

2011-06-10T23:55:00.001-07:00

I am way too busy to blog... but I have to spread the word: SEE THIS MOVIE! It is powerful and moving! Seriously Go see it. NOW.

http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi612735001/

I don't know how to make the little video thing pop up here so you can just watch it here...

Ugh...

2010-11-06T23:53:00.000-07:00

I am terrible at blogging. I am sorry about that.

Blogging takes a backseat to just about everything else I am doing right now. I am going to school full time to finish my degree. I also work part time. (still for Inspired by Finn) I have to pick Beckham up from his school everyday at 12:45, and his school is downtown so we try and spend the day doing fun cultural things instead of 'just going home' so my home time is limited to the morning and the evening, both of which are spent with my sweet babies. And then there are the late nights, usually spent finishing homework and reading.

So, there you have it, a long explanation as to why this blog is rarely updated. I will work at doing at least one post a month....

Up next:

A love letter to my sweetest baby boy! (because, MAN, I love that little boyfriend of mine!) (if you want to see the cutest picture ever, check out my Facebook profile picture, it is Ev as a gnome... you will die of the cuteness!)

Also I need to post about Becks awesome school... seriously it is such a blessing that we are there.

Until next time.... I love you all!

My FIRST is FIVE!

2010-08-15T22:47:00.000-07:00

O Beckham, My Beckham!

You are it! You are everything! So smart, and funny, and handsome and talented! You have the memory of an elephant. (they have good memories, right?) And did I say funny?

I can't believe that this day is here! You are FIVE! I remember holding you when you were and infant and saying out loud, that there was no way you could ever be five. It was so hard to imagine such a tiny babe ever getting that old!

I always tell you how grateful I am to you wanted to be the first to come to our family. What a hard job you have, forging me into a mother. Ironing out my rough edges. You are so sweet and patient with me as I learn while you grow!

You will always be the first. The day you were born changed me forever. You sent me on this path that I am so glad to be on.

Beckham, I want you to know that I love you so much, so incredibly much! You are my heart on the outside. You challenge me in the right ways, and only when I resist those changes do we run into trouble, but that is not you, it is me that needs to change... you need to keep pushing me, making me a better person, mother.

You know this, but you can read my mind. You often speak what I am thinking, right before I am about to speak. Every time it happens, I am shocked. Even though I know that you and I are deeply connected, it stills shocks me that you are so in tune with me to know what runs through my mind on a regular basis, like we are reading the same book at the same time. I love that about you. I love that we get to share so much with each other.

What a great big brother you are. Not only to Scar, but to Evey, too. Your siblings adore you, so much! You are the center of their world and they hang on everything you do and say! And you deserve that, you are so wonderful to them! (most of the time). That is the thing about you, you are a charmer. Most everyone that meets you loves you instantly. You have a natural charisma. (or else it is those striking dark brown eyes you have...)

Becks, you are my sweetest boy! I am so glad that you are mine. I am so excited to see the man you will become. Let's keep dancing together, always!

Kisses and love,

Mom

Always so silly!

You love to play dress up, always have.

Letter to Scarlett:

2010-08-07T01:12:00.001-07:00

Oh, my Sweet Scar,

I have been wanting to tell you how much I am going to miss my little 2 year old girl! You are turning 3!!! I can not believe it! From the moment you were born (and mad at me that I made you come out a day early) I have been in so much LOVE with you! But, 2 year old Scarlett has so far been the best one! The morning of your second birthday you made me laugh with sweet little musings and songs. And you have continued to do so all year! You became a big sister this year too! It has been so much fun and fills me with so much joy (and anxiety,lol) when you hold your little brother. You were so wise through my pregnancy, always knowing the right things to say to calm my nerves. I felt so much responsibility to be honest and teach you the truth and importance of birth, since you are my daughter, (oh, my sweet daughter) and you will be experiencing those things some day. And you listened to every word I taught you, even teaching strangers that babies "come out of 'ginas."

Just the other day you asked if you could get back in my womb and be my little baby again, you said you want to be warm forever! Maybe you sense how I am feeling about you (and your big brother) growing up.

Scarlett, you are so sweet and loving and beautiful, but you know all of that. I want you to know something else... you probably already know this too.... but Scar, you know so much about faith, and posses so much of it, it is bursting out of your tiny body. You have taught me more than you can ever imagine about how to live faithfully, and to Trust the Lord. The prayers you speak teach me how to talk to our Father in Heaven more purely. You are so generous and kind and selfless, you are who the Lord speaks of when he asks us to become 'as little children.'

I am not sure why this transition from toddler-hood to childhood is so hard on me, and I have been dreading this day... maybe because 3 is always harder than 2... and 2 has been so great.... and I can see the 3's coming... but I just want you to know now, how I am feeling about you at this very moment in time. As the whole house sleeps and I sit at the computer weeping and missing my sweet little two year old girl. I want you to know that I love you! Really I love you, to the red planet, to the stars, to planet area (something she always tells me... )!!! I am so blessed that you are mine, (for a while longer). You will be a wonderful woman someday, but I want to wait a little longer for that, I need you to be my little girl now!

Happy Birthday My Little Thing! Thank you for all the joy and love you have to share!

Love you always and forever,

Mama

Some Pictures

2010-08-05T16:25:00.001-07:00

Everett's Blessing Day... Not a great picture, but the only one I have, lol.

Sweet Becks, is turning 5 in less than 2 weeks!

And this little thing.... turning 3 on Monday!

not sure what to post anymore.

2010-05-22T00:09:00.001-07:00

I am sick of feeling obligated to have photos before I can post. We happen to be able to live life with out taking pictures of it... (was that really snarky or what?) It is late and I am tired, but can't sleep.

My Sister had her baby at Home, it was a vbac, or more accurately an hbac. I am really proud of her! It is Weird because when people told me that after I had Everett, I thought it was such a weird thing to say... that they were proud of me... for what? I *just* had a baby, people have been doing that forever... literally. But now I do feel proud... Proud of her and proud of me. I really feel so blessed to have had Everett the way I did. To understand more of who he is by the way he chose to come to this earth.

Man, I love that boy. He is seriously my sweetest little boyfriend! He rolls over now, has been for a week or so. And Laughs all the time. He loves when I talk about his birth, he smiles and coos through the whole time I am talking. He is tongue tied, like me. I love that we share that... I wonder if he wont be able to say his "R's" correctly either. He hates being hot, which is going to make for a hard summer in this AZ heat. He loves his siblings too. And they really love him. When Either one of them is having a hard day, and extra grumpy, I let them hold Ev, he can cheer any one up. Even a grumpy 4 and a half year old. I call it Baby therapy. It really works!

Since his birth I have been more introspective. I am evolving. Wanting to, not resisting the force to. He opened me to that. Showed me How to have complete faith.

I am going to go back to school. I am also starting my studies to become a Midwife. I went to my first Student Midwives meeting this week. I am so thrilled about it. It feels like home. I am meant to be there!

But I have some anxiety about all of it. How can I be the mom I want to be, and still accomplish the things I want to? Faith. Faith? I know that is the road I am supposed to be traveling.

Can I talk more about Birth? That is still all I think about, and I am not even pregnant... It matters so much. It matters. The way children are born matters. Let us prepare our daughters for it. Teach them it is safe. That their bodies work. To trust themselves.

I should go to bed... smell my babies sweet scent as I cuddle him and fall to sleep. Babies really smell SO good.

GoodNight.

My Everett Man

2010-03-29T11:25:00.000-07:00

Pictures...

2010-02-23T11:15:00.000-08:00

These are out of order...(I still can't figure out blogger's stupid uploading system)

This is the night he was born... How sweet for your first night in the world, alseep with your family at home!!!

This is right after he was born... well after I got to the bed... We are still attached- physically.

Grandad and Everett... His 9th Great Grand child

Valentines day, We went to the Train park. Our First family Outing.

Just one of him.

How Firm a Foundation... The Birth of Everett Windsor Flynn

2010-02-10T09:23:00.001-08:00

Fear not, I am with thee; oh, be not dismayed,

For I am thy God and will still give thee aid.

I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand,

Upheld by my righteous, omnipotent hand.

This song has played through my head throughout my whole pregnancy, it is what would come to mind when I would start to fear, when I would start to doubt if my body was capable, when Satan was using all in his power to make me feel like I couldn't do this IMPORTANT WORK of God. This Song played in my head throughout my labor, with out me consciously thinking of it.

I sit here with my seven day old babe in my arms (sling) trying to think of where to start. Scarlett's birth? 7 Days ago? When is the starting point of me preparing for this life experience? I don't know. So, I will just jump into it and see what comes out the other end.

My whole life I have known I was meant for greatness, That sounds a little puffed up of me to say, but that is how I have always felt, that I was going to change the world some day. I still feel that way, but the perspective of that Great Change I am going to make is different now, more clear, perhaps. My children are going to be the fruit of my greatness, the reason I am here on this earth, is to be their compass back to their Father in Heaven. And how I bring them into the world directly correlates with how I will direct them home.

Scarlett's birth was traumatic and hard for me to recover from, I didn't even begin to process it until she was about six months old. The positive effects of her birth were that Corey was on board for a home birth for our next child no matter the cost. So as I started processing how I felt about Scarlett's birth and what I wanted to be different, I gained a lot of knowledge from books and friends who had been there. And my mind was set, I was having a home birth when we had more children. Healthy women are meant to birth at home in peace and love.

We found out we were pregnant with Everett in June, I was thrilled. This pregnancy was completely different from my pregnancy with my other two. I was sick for nearly 20 weeks and had a lot more worries and trepidation about a lot of little weird things. I felt a strong urge this time to prepare mentally for the birth, I feel that my nesting manifested by me wanting to meditate and find time to read and study both spiritual things and things relating to the birth. I never really nested in the traditional sense of 'having' to clean my house obsessively or get physical things together. And I am grateful that I prepared and read as much as I did. Because throughout my labor I heard Ina May's voice reminding me of the things she taught, I heard the voices of the women whose births inspired me, I had a constant song in my heart of the love God has for me. And all of that carried me through.

Saturday the 6th was supposed to be my blessing way(think the EXACT opposite of a baby shower. meaningful. powerful.) I was busy the week before getting my house cleaned and prepped for that, as it was to take place in my birthing space. On Thursday I had some free time and the woman who sells birthing supplies lives in my neighborhood, so I decided to walk the kids there and pick them up. good timing!

I went to bed Thursday night with some contractions, light and nothing that I really noticed because with my other two I had a lot (I mean, weeks) of prodomal labor. They were still there when I woke up on Friday, but I just went about my usual stuff, I had a long list of things I needed to do that day to get ready for Saturday. By the time I finished work at the computer it was about 10:15 am I got up to go take a shower and felt something leak out of me, I thought maybe it was my mucus plug and was a little excited thinking that the contractions I had been having we opening me a little. (not that I thought I would be in labor, I was open to a 4 for a week with Becks and a 5 for a few days with Scar before labor started) I went up stairs to get in the shower, I remember Saying a prayer on the way up letting Heavenly Father know that I knew all things were done in His time, and if I went into labor that day, that I would be okay with that. (ha!) When I got to the bathroom, I realized what I had leaked was not mucus plug at all, just A LOT of blood. I actually didn't get fearful then, just curious, I didn't know what it could be, and I had never experienced that before, but I knew it was something. I got in the shower, and got ready and then called my midwife to let her know what happened. She didn't seem too worried. And said to call in an hour if it hadn't stopped or got worse.

In the mean time, I started to freak out a little, I was praying and wondering what I should do, and I felt like I needed to get a blessing. I tried to call Corey to come home to do that for me, but since I had lost my phone, I had his, so I could only call his office phone and he wasn't at his desk because it was lunch time. So I called my dad, he couldn't come, because he was in a meeting in Mesa, so I called my little brother Zach. I let them know what was happening and he said he would be right over. By this time I am freaking out a lot. I was thinking of all the possibilities it could be: placental previa? placental abruption? partial placental separation? blood in my waters??? I didn't know, but I was worried for the baby, I have a doppler and I got that out and listened to his heart beat. It was fine, but up high on my belly, confirming to me he was still breech. (I had known he was breech for a few weeks or more but was never worried about it, I knew that he would be born the way he needed to be, and would turn if he was supposed to be head down.) I called Pam (my midwife) back and let her know that the bleeding hadn't stopped and that I thought it was heavier. I told her she should come over to check it out. So she said she was on her way.

While waiting, I put on spiritual music and tried to just lay and relax. Also, the carpet cleaner showed up to steam clean my carpets (again, for the blessing way) and I let him know if he was quick he could stay. Zach showed up shortly after, at about 12:30, He gave me the blessing in the pantry in the Kitchen because we wanted some privacy from the carpet guy. The words he spoke and blessed me with really comforted me, and after that I finally felt a sense of peace about what was happening. Even though I still didn't know what was happening, I knew that whatever it was that we would be okay, that it would be peaceful.

Zach offered to take my kids back to My parents house with him, and I was hesitant, but they both wanted to go, and it turned out to be great that he took them. I finally got a hold of Corey and told him I wanted him home. He said he was on his way. Pam and her apprentice midwife, Cheyenne, showed up about 1ish just as Zach was leaving and the Carpet guy was finishing up. She was confused, but I explained that we were having my blessing the next day and I had scheduled the carpet cleaner earlier in the week and didn't want to cancel him. We hung out until he was gone, and then went up stair to check and see what was happening.

After she checked me, she reassured me that it wasn't my waters, and that it actually wasn't that much blood, at least not as much as I thought. Although that was reassuring, that didnt answer where the blood was coming from. I felt like getting an ultra sound was the best choice. We scheduled an ultra sound at a nearby lab for 3pm. I ate lunch and we waited for Corey. He got home about 2:15 and we left for the Ultra sound about 2:30. All this time I had been having contractions, that slowly started to become more noticeable, but never painful. I dont time contractions, to me there is no need, if you are in labor you will know it eventually. But I did notice that in the 15 minute drive to the lab I had 3.

While waiting to be called back for the ultrasound, I was thinking about the possibility if it was placental previa, which would require a c section, and how I was okay if that was the outcome of this, that all that REALLY did matter to me was to have a healthy baby, and although it would not be ideal, I could eventually heal from that experience. I was still feeling very peaceful, and happy. Not worried anymore. My mantra throughout this pregnancy, words I would repeat over and over when I felt nervous upset, scared, angry... or when I just needed to ground myself, were: "I am Happy. I love you, Baby." I repeated that a few times while we waited.

The Ultrasound tech was Awesome! I rarely say that about medical professionals, but this girl was really great! I had quite a few of more intense contractions during the scan and I would tell her when one was starting and she would take the wand off of me and wait till it was over. Through those contractions, I would repeat my mantra, and picture a glowing red ball, they weren't painful at all. The placenta was fine, up high, and not separating. She could see no place where the bleeding could be coming from. She also confirmed he was breech, and that he was in the complete breech position. (this is him sitting with his legs crossed, as the presenting body part.)

After the scan, Pam, Cheyenne, Corey and I discussed what to do next. I was obviously having contractions, pretty close together, and I had to be quiet and sway through them. But I think I was still in denial, All of what I read and heard about breech was that it was a lot slower than a vertex birth, and that it would take more time. So I felt confident to send them home and that I would call when things really got going.

On our drive home we stopped at the grocery store, and that is where I knew I was in real labor! The rushes were getting more intense and I felt like I would float away if I didnt have Corey hold my shoulders. I needed him to put his hands firmly on my shoulder and press during each rush, and it really helped me stay in my own body and work with each contraction, instead of trying to escape them.

On the drive home, About 4:45, I called my sister to bring my kids back home, and called my Doula to let her know what was happening. She was at a birth with another client in the hospital, and I felt okay that she was there, I truly feel like women need more support in the hospital than I would have at home and I was happy to let that other woman have my amazing doula's love. I told her I would love to have her at my birth if she could make it, but if not, that I loved her and would keep her updated.

Once I got home I started the bath, and went and sat on the toilet. There, I had several really intense contraction that I had to moan through while Corey held onto me. After that I told Corey he had better call Pam to come back, that this was going faster than I thought.

I am not sure the time line of the rest of the evening, but I will tell as best as I can remember.

I got in the bath sitting Indian style (is that not PC anymore?) and was doing okay through the rushes, I still had to moan through them but they weren't as intense. I got too hot in the bath and went to the bed, I was on my hands and knees there, and had Corey applying counter pressure to my back during the rushes, it worked for a few but then became unbearable. So I went back to the bath.

Things really picked up and Pam arrived at some point, when the contractions were right on top of each other. Pretty soon after she arrived I felt like I needed to push. But with a breech baby, you have to make sure you are fully dilated before you start pushing. In a multip mom (a mom who has had more than one vaginal delivery) if she felt the urge to push at 8cm, she could and the head would push the rest of the cervix out of the way, but with breech, if you aren't fully dilated the bum (or the presenting body part) might make it through but then the head could get stuck on the rest of the cervix. (get it?)

It was a catch 22 though, I wouldn't let her check me because the contractions were right on top of each other and and she wouldn't let me push (what I desperately needed to do) because she couldn't check me. I finally let her, I Yelled "Fast! GO! now!"

I was fully dilated.

I have read a lot of Breach birth stories, talked to my midwife about breech birth a lot, and my doula herself had a breech home birth, and all of them shared the same sentiment. That the pushing stage is slow and long. That is what I thought I was in for.

At this point, a second midwife showed up. (Vaginal breech births are becoming somewhat of a phenomenon, since almost all doctors section immediately for breech, catching breech babies is becoming a lost art. Sad state for such a developed country, but alas, this is just the tip of that iceberg! Anyways, anytime there is one, people want to be there, so she wanted to come.) I was happy to see her. I had never met her before but having a new face there made a difference, she smelled good and I asked her for a hug. She gave me one.

I was pushing slowly with each contraction, and it felt wild. Pushing a head down baby out, feels good, at least I thought it did, with Everett though, I still was having HARD contractions and pushing a bum and foot was hard. It felt like a box, hard and lumpy with corners, not smooth and round like a head. After about 5 contractions of pushing, I needed a change. They offered the birth stool. I thought that was a great idea. They brought it to the tub and I sat up on it as fast as I could between the small dips in rushes I was having.

I pushed once, and he was right there, no ring of fire, just a baby. I told Pam, and pushed one more time, and he was out. Foot First and then his bum. He was facing my right leg. At 6:34pm. and I didn't have a single tear.

They immediately put him on my chest and a towel over him. No one knew what gender he was, since he was cross legged. When I saw his face I knew he was a boy.

I was SHOCKED. I am pretty sure the first words I said when he was out was: "WHAT?"
I could believe he was out, after such a short time, I thought I would be doing that for hours. I also couldn't believe he was born at 37 weeks. I was totally unprepared for that!

Corey started calling people (still not knowing the sex) and letting them know that "The baby is out" Jessica showed up with Beckham and Scarlett, Beckham came running in saying" Well, what is it?" I let him be the first to look. He was over the moon! So happy that he had a brother! Scarlett came and said hi, and then went about her business.

The rest of the night was pretty typical for after a birth. I birth the placenta, Drank a smoothie, Weighed the baby, took a shower, and by about 10 pm all the visitors left and we were left with our little, but much fuller family. I was high. I could hardly sleep. everyone else sleep soundly that night, but I was beaming, glowing, reveling.

I did it! He was early and breech and I did it! All things are possible with the Lord!

The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose
I will not, I cannot, desert to his foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,
I’ll never, no never, I’ll never, no never,
I’ll never, no never, no never forsake!

Pictures to come, I haven't uploaded them yet.

The Boy with no name!

2010-02-07T09:26:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to announce the birth of my sweet baby boy!

He has no name yet...

He was born at home foot and bottom first ( breech). On Friday February 5th, He was 6 pounds and 18 inches, (born at 37 weeks 1 day gestation, that is 3 weeks early!)

He is handsome and tiny and I am sooo in love.

We are so in love!

My Cute Little Christmas Peanuts

2010-01-09T12:46:00.001-08:00

Just Pictures!

Luckiest!!!!

2010-01-05T12:46:00.000-08:00

See that picture? Do you see How I paid for that $44oo piece of equipment? That is right, a SWEEPSTAKES!!!! My Good friend Erica posted on her blog about how RainbowPlay was having a sweepstakes and how she entered, I decided I should enter as well. I am always convinced I am going to win, and in fact, I DID!!!

They sent me an email in October letting me know I won. I was thrilled! Jumping around the house and yelling!

I had to sign a form and send it in and they said it would be 10-12 weeks after they received the paper work that I would get the Play set. Waiting was hard, Beckham would ask every time we got the mail if the Play set came yet. (Obviously it hadn't)

I was also worried they would just deliver a box, with a play set inside, that we would have to put together. My husband (love him) but he is not the handiest. (remind me to tell you about the time he almost killed us because he decided to change our brake pads, lol) And if we had to put the play set together ourselves, Well I don't think it would be safe for the kids to play on it, lol.

But then on Christmas Eve, I get an email from a local Rainbow Play contractor saying they would like to come the morning of the 5th to set it up for us!

My Dream Come true!!!!

The yard before...

The men working...

Ready to Play on!!!

I love Scarlett's face in this one, Pure Joy!

The yard After!!!!

It has a slide, a rock wall, two swings, a tire swing (under the balcony thing) an net climber, and a gymnastic type swing thing. SO FUN!

And Just so you know... You are welcome to come play WHENEVER you want! Our door is always open!!!

So true...

2010-01-04T15:39:00.000-08:00

"You won't 'get it' at first. At First it is all about technique, and position, and time, and swallowing, and soreness, and feeling as if your whole world has narrowed to Feeding The Baby. Those of us who have enjoyed nursing our children are on the other side of a great emotional gulf from you. We can't explain it, we can only try and help you cross the bridge, to where you can see for yourself. If you stay caught up in this as a feeding method, you may never get all the way across the bridge. But oh, the view from the other side!" (www.normalfed.com)

I was stuck in the 'feeding aspect of breastfeeding with Beckham, With Scar;ett, I had crossed the bridge and truely nursed her. What a difference!

As I am typing this I am getting a little weepy, because my baby girl is weaning... only asks to nurse a few times a week now, and even then doesnt really mean it when she asks. What a sweet time for us.

She saw the picture I have of us nursing, and loves it, talks all about how she loves nursing with mommy. I am so happy I gave that to her! Worth everything!

Jessica Had her Baby!

2009-11-24T12:03:00.000-08:00

And I got to be there to witness it!

It was powerful and exciting. Jessica looked Beautiful, and did a great job. I was also really impressed with Pam's (her midwife-- and mine) instincts.

She had a baby girl (no name yet) she was 7 pounds 15 ounces and 19 inches long. hard labor only lasted less than 3 hours. The baby was born at Home ( my parents, that is where she and her family are living now) in the water at 8:44 pm on November 23rd, 2009.

I am about 28 weeks, now, and have been thinking a lot about the birth of my babe, After seeing Jessica go through it, I am not quite ready for that intense of an experience. But it will come, (it has too, haha)

and I think the greatest part, besides the baby of course, is that my parents are COMPLETELY sold on Home births... they were timid about the idea... but through out the whole thing, couldn't stop saying how great it was compared to being at the hospital, and why wouldn't every woman do that. Awesome!

Staci, look at this!

2009-10-01T21:22:00.001-07:00

Cutest boys!

Monumental Day!!!

2009-09-30T10:28:00.000-07:00

Okay, so today is a great day! I finally picked a Midwife!!!

At 19 weeks (I think) pregnant, and now I have two member of my birth team lined up. I picked my doula a few weeks ago, (although I have known she would be there since I was very first pregnant, we just have that sort of connection) and now I have my midwife! I am very relieved to have this figured out, it was a hard decision for me.

Anyways, just wanted to share my joy in this decision.

love for all!

Check this out!

2009-09-30T08:56:00.000-07:00

www.momsmilkboutique.com

one of my good friends is the owner of this store! IT is a great place to get all your natural baby needs. Support this work at home mama!

UGH Pregnancy Dreams!

2009-09-29T08:11:00.000-07:00

I hate them... I have been having this reoccurring nightmare where I am in labor and all my birth team is at my house waiting... and then my labor stalls and everyone is totally judging me and criticizing me for not 'preforming'. It actually is a terrible feeling. and I hate that I keep having this dream... does that mean that is going to happen? ( I have to assume that it wont, because if every pregnancy dream happened, a lot of weird crap would be going on in my life) I suppose it is one of my fears that is playing out in my dreams. but I hate it and wish it would stop.

This pregnancy is weird... I have always heard people say 'no two pregnancies are alike' and I believed them but thought since I only had had two and and I had two different sexes, I thought there was 'girl pregnancies' and 'boy pregnancies' and since this time we are not finding out the sex, I cant tell you what this is, but it doesn't fit into the boy or the girl one I have had before. It is completely different.

Okay I am done rambling, my sweet girl needs me...

Something Personal.

2009-09-19T21:46:00.001-07:00

Tonight I went to a Birthday party for one of my good friend's, daughter's, 18th birthday. (did that make sense?) . She Invited me to be a support for her because she was having a hard time with her baby being 18. (She also has a 6 and 2 year old.) Anyways, after we served them dinner, She had a little ceremony type thing set up for her daughter, Where she wanted to acknowledge her as a woman in front of her friends and to Let her know that she has the support of her family and friend as she makes that journey into adulthood.

I really appreciated it. I had a hard time becoming a woman. That was the hardest time in my life (so far) The years when I was 18 - 21(ish). I loved being a teenager, and am confident in who I am now. But then, I felt lost and alone, I lost my path on the straight and narrow, lost my faith in the Lord, and was wandering. I would have loved if I knew that there were people who were there and to feel supported.

I admire my friend (Kate) so much, for so many different reasons, but one of the main reasons is because she has an 18 year old who has turned out so well... We have the same parenting ideals and seeing that someone has parented like me and had it work out, is very encouraging. Being there to see her honor her daughter was very touching for me.

I thought of my children, especially Scarlett. Of what I hoped they would be like at 18, how our relationship would be. and I just hope that they don't feel like I did at that age, lost and alone. The mistakes I made in those years, while I was lost, weren't minor, and I cant easily hide them (nor do I want to). I met and married a wonderful man, who I have since been sealed to. I was able to have our first born be at that sealing. I talk to Beckham all the time about how he was at the temple with us. I just struggle with how to separate my mistakes from what I want my children to become.

I think about Scarlett because I know what it was like (for me) to become a woman, the insecurities I felt, the temptations I had, and I am sad for her to feel the same things I felt. I want so badly to protect her from that. There is one scripture that really helps me realize I don't need to fear, my children are on the same path I am back to our Heavenly Father, it is 2 Nephi 25: 26 "And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins" That's it! If they falter, like I did, I hope that I have taught them that they have support and love from the Highest source. (and of course me as well.)

I hope some of this made sense. I am really just rambling about what I am feeling. Thank you for listening.

Pictures

2009-09-16T20:11:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures from our trip to California back in March. I just recovered them off of our broken camera.

We (Beckham, Scarlett, and I) flew out to hang out with My sister Staci and her family. It was extra fun because my good friend from high school was there for a couple of days, and I introduced her to the joys of babywearing.

Enjoy!

Guess who got a Camera?

2009-09-12T15:09:00.000-07:00

It's Me! It's me!

Here are the few pictures I have taken since we have gotten it, It is hard to remember to take pictures when you haven't been doing it forever.

Beckham as Draculis (that is what he calls him)

this is at a friends house.

So, My kids dress them selves EVERYDAY, This was yesterday.

Scarlett has clothes on but she accessorized with broken sunglasses, a backpack, and not pictured: bracelets, a purse, a water bottle hung around her neck, and another pair of sunglasses hanging from her shirt. Very Stylish.

Beckham has a nice church outfit on, except he is wearing his black converse... he is never NOT wearing those. You should have seen him the Day before... HE worn a long sleeved Basketball shirt, his favorite jeans with Huge holes in the knees (that deserve their own post all together) a batman cape, mask, and glove (yes, singular) and then to top it off, Underwear OVER his jeans, because 'Mom, that is what Batman wears."

But in this picture, He is Bruce Wayne.

And Just a close up of our sweet Girlfriend.

You missed thier sweet faces, huh??

Don't worry there will be more to come!

A Word to the Wise

2009-09-10T18:36:00.000-07:00

When your morning sickness finally subsides (@ 16 and 1/2 weeks along) Do not decide to celebrate buy making yourself a HUGE milkshake. It will come back.

I don't feel well anymore. I had one to two good days and then I decided to have a treat. Not a good idea.

I will write when I feel well enough to do so.

Interesting thing I read today:

2009-08-13T21:07:00.001-07:00

thought I would share....

on breastfeeding... of course...

Isn’t it interesting that the part of the world producing the most pornography and exporting it to the rest of the globe has seemed to lose all sense of the true meaning of the human breast? What a commentary on the sad state of our sexually wounded culture! Breasts have been so “pornified” that we can fall into thinking that even their proper use is shameful. In other words, we have been so conditioned to see a woman’s body through the prism of lust that we find it very difficult to recognize the purity and innocence of breast-feeding.

H O T

2009-08-07T13:15:00.000-07:00

I am sitting at home in my house that is about 99 degrees, because our A/C broke! I am here because the A/C guys are here fixing it and I have to be here to supervise? (that is a question, why am I here?)

Being hot is the worst! Being Pregnant and hot is beyond terrible. Let us hope this fix works, we are supposed to have a family dinner at our new house here on Sunday and I still have to get the house ready for that. (On Sunday, Scarlett turns 2!!)

Alright. I am going to go back to baking... myself...

I actually do love being pregnant

2009-07-28T14:33:00.000-07:00

But Corey probably doesn't believe me! I have been so sick lately, which I think is fine, just a little hard when you have 2 Little's to take care of.

But I do love how in tune with your whole body you are when you are pregnant, and how conscience you are of your habits (eating, sleeping, drinking, etc) and How readily your emotions show up (being really weepy).

Creating a human (well God did that, so Manufacturing a human) is amazing work. I am so blessed and grateful that I can be a part of this magical process.

Now on to some advice I need... From everything I have ever read, or from what any midwife or birthing expert has told me is that 'adequate protein' is 100grams per day. I can get to about 60g no problem, but getting in that last bit, esp. while sick is really hard! Does anyone have any suggestions on what they did or good recipes that have a lot of protein. I just bought some Brewer's Yeast (to help sneak in protein and help my milk production) but I need more. What do you guys got?

and the winner is...

2009-07-25T16:50:00.001-07:00

... Laura ( so email me all your shipping info and which piece of Jewelry you want. rach[dot]fly[at] gmail[dot]com) YAY!

I wrote all the names on a piece of paper and let Beckham pick the winner... that is how random I can get!

Sorry it took so long to get this, we just moved into our house, and I just found out I am pregnant (about 9 weeks) and blogging seems to get lower and lower on the priority list... sorry!

I am going to be blogging a lot about this pregnancy, as part of my overall healing in hope of getting the birth I want I need to be open and honest and share with others who can give me thier feedback... so I am counting on you mama's for your help!

love to all!

Did you know... (and a giveaway!)

2009-07-07T15:30:00.000-07:00

... I have a job? That is right I am a working mom! I work for the GREATEST boss in the world! I bring my kids with me, and I make my own hours! And it is for a company I believe in! (and I am not using this 'job" as a euphemism for motherhood, although I am sure it works)

So, I work For Kate, she owns the business, Inspired by Finn. (Finn is her Son, who is adorable and more like my son, than a friend's child) I have been working there since about April of 2008, so a little over a year. I swear I couldn't ask for a better gig! I doubt I will ever give it up.

She sells amber (please see the pics above, I can't figure out how to get them below what I type.) Amber is amazing stuff! I remember when I first saw it on several kids from the mommies group I am in (which is another post all to itself) and thought the necklaces were beautiful! When they told me they used them for teething and that a woman in our group sold them I had to have one. I then proceeded to buy Several... Then when she mentioned that she needed some help for her business, I eagerly said I would do it.. she laughed at me and said I just wanted the discount I would get (which she was partially right) So I started the next week... I didn't even tell Corey till a week later, and casually mentioned that I had gotten a job. I has been wonderful ever since.

So what is Amber? Well here is an explanation from her site: Our Baltic Amber jewelry is a unique piece of history…The amber beads are fossils from an ancient forest which existed tens of millions of years ago.

Baltic amber is not a stone, but a fossilized tree resin.

Historically, Baltic Amber has been used in Europe as a natural and traditional remedy and curative for many ailments for centuries. Long ago it was considered one of the leading ‘medicines’ of its time. Baltic Amber is the most esteemed amber in the world, and the healing qualities of Baltic Amber make it unlike any other type of amber found in the world.

When baltic amber is worn on the skin, the skin’s warmth releases trace amounts of healing oils from the amber. These oils contain succinic acid and are absorbed into the skin.

Baltic Amber has some of the highest concentrations of Succinic Acid found in nature, and this is what makes it so special. Succinic Acid is a natural component of plant and animal tissues, and it's presence in the human body is beneficial in many ways.

How can baltic amber help us?

Pain Relief -

Baltic amber contains analgesic properties and helps take the edge off of many types of discomfort associated with dental issues, headaches, joint pain, etc.

Strengthens the body's immune system -

In many different and subtle ways, succinic acid helps boost the body's own natural healing ability and immune system.

Restoring Energy –

The human body naturally produces succinic acid. The salt of succinic acid (succinate) is one of the most active substances in the processes of cellular respiration and intercellular energy creation. Succinic acid restores oxygen and energy supply to depleted cells and helps the body return to a normal, functioning state.

Succinate is a raw material and a catalyst in the Krebs Cycle which is one of our main sources of energy. During the Krebs Cycle carbohydrates, fats, and proteins are metabolized for energy.

Maintaining Wellness -

When the human body reacts to stress, the body’s cells begin to use oxygen more quickly. Oxygen plays a central role in the intercellular creation of energy, and a lack of oxygen can result in feeling lethargic.

Oxygen is alkaline-forming in the blood and maintaining a slightly alkaline blood ph helps keep us healthy. Whenever the body functions in a state of low oxygen, it is much more susceptible to illness.

To help break a cycle of (chronic) inflammation -

Where chronic inflammation is present, disease lurks.

When the body’s cells are chronically inflamed the human body’s immune system response is to increase production of free radicals. Chronic overproduction of free radicals results in inflammatory-related disease. Chronic inflammation is a common denominator of many seemingly unrelated diseases.

Does it really work? YES YES AND YES!!!! When I first heard about it I thought it was weird, to tell you the truth. But I figured even if it didn't work I thought it was cute enough to for Scarlett to wear anyways. So I put her first necklace on her. At the time she was teething! You know the time when they wake in the night screaming for No reason, they used to be good sleepers but now they wake up and cry in the middle of the night... well... they are in pain! So That first night, she slept so soundly! I was sold! I have given many right off of Scarlett's neck, to moms who I would meet who would complain of their child's teething discomforts and swear to them that it worked.. usually they are as skeptical as I was, but are also as desperate as I was to bring their happy babies back, ( or they are just trying to be nice to a crazy woman who gave them a necklace, hahah) and subsequently I get a number of emails from those same moms I just mentioned, saying that "It worked" "My baby took a 3 hour nap for the first time in days" I have my baby back, Thank you!"

I also know a woman who swears by them, she had RA (rheumatoid Arthritis) and she just has to hold the amber for her to start feeling her joints loosen and pain relief set in. It really is amazing! And since working there I have heard so many personal stories from customers who cant live with out the amber. It really is amazing! and Natural and safe and Beautiful!

How does it work??? Okay, your baby DOESN'T Chew on it! It has Succinic acid in it, pain relieving property your body naturally produces, but the amber is Highly concentrated, when worn on warm skin it gets absorbed. (go read the red area I pasted from her site!)

So here is where the giveaway comes in... Leave me a comment, tell me anything, just Hi, or why you could use the amber... and the winner Chosen, probably next week... will get their choice of amber from the site... any color or style up to 16 inches in length! Here is the link to her site again: Inspired by Finn

Also if you are so anxious, and have a teething baby now or are in pain your self and can't wait for the contest to end to get your amber, you can use this code: RachelBlog and receive a 20% discount on anything you order(including BABYLEGS!) We ship all over the World, so everyone is eligible!!!

House Hunting

2009-06-22T09:19:00.001-07:00

Things that I think while walking through a potential house:

Where will I put the Christmas tree?

Where will I have my babies?

Does it have a place in the back for my garden?

Would the neighbors (or HOA) care if I had chickens?

Is the laundry room big enough for all my diaper stuff?

Is the Master big enough for all of us?

Does it have 2 A/C's?

What colors would go with the tile? would I like to paint my walls those colors?

Where will the kids play room be?

Can a trampoline fit in the back?

What about a hammock?

and a Sandbox?

Corey's list is quite a bit different than mine and includes things about a flat screen TV and the size of the garage and amount of storage... IT is hard meeting in the middle. I do, however have faith we will find the perfect house.

Impromptu Camping Trip

2009-06-01T16:12:00.001-07:00

No pictures, but I will try to be descriptive, haha.

So on Saturday Morning Corey and I were cuddling on the bed while the kids were slowly waking up and decided we wanted to do something fun for the day--- I mentioned that we could go to Farrell's Cinema Supper Club (I have a gift certificate) It is a movie theatre where you have dinner... Fun--- but could turn disastrous with kids. OR I thought maybe we could go Camping, Corey's parents got us a tent and cooking equipment for Christmas this past year that we needed to break in. So we started packing for the camping trip, It only took about 3 hours and then we were on the road. Luckily I checked the weather before we left because we were going to head right into some thunderstorms, so I quickly printed out some campsites for the eastern part of the state (where the storms hadn't reached yet). IT was a beautiful drive, Beckham seriously asked 50+ times "Are we there yet?" Hahaha I didn't think that was real... I don't remember saying that as a child and I thought is was something only TV kids did--- but apparently Beckham does too. We had to keep coming up with detailed explanations of why we weren't there--- Like: "When you don't see anymore buildings then we are almost there," or "When you don't see anymore cactuses(cacti?) we are almost there." But we eventually made it.

We got there and set up our tent (which is huge btw, we could take probably 15 more people, lol, not literally but it is big!) and I sent Corey into town for the things we needed: Cash (to pay the ground keeper for our site), Breakfast food, Water and Diapers. HE only forgot the diapers, lol... so Scarlett went potty like the rest of us, In the woods, lol. (she is subsequently refusing to wear diapers at all now.) WE had tin foil dinners for dinner and then roasted Marshmallows. Scarlett was scared of the fire, Beckham was Not. We eventually made our way to bed, and slept pretty well--- it was a little cold, but okay. In the morning I woke up and made Bacon and Eggs on our new stove. What a great thing to have while camping. After breakfast I went to clean up our sleeping stuff and get it ready to pack up while the boys had fun shooting the BB gun. Nature is so good for kids. It really restarts their little batteries and they are more cooperative and pleasant when we are out in nature. (not that mine are ever UN-cooperative, or UN-pleasant ;)ha! ) Once we got everything packed up we headed to Tonto creek which was about 2 miles away, and went swimming, well Corey went swimming after about a 20 minute walk into the freezing water, I got in for a few minutes but it was way too clod to try and prove that I was tougher than Corey, haha.

On our ride home we got some homemade Ice cream and fudge. Stopped at Sunset point and moseyed on into town. When we got home Scarlett said " See the water" Meaning she wanted to see our apartment pool, so I walked her over there, and we all decided that swimming would be the perfect end to the day, so we did.

We then Came home, took showers, and went to bed. I slept so well last night!

It was a really nice weekend. Great actually. I love my family.

Hope you enjoyed reading this, I know posts like this aren't any fun to read when there are no pics associated with them. Sorry!

love.

Missed May

2009-05-28T09:54:00.000-07:00

Whoops!

I still dont have a camera. Bummer.
Beckham finished soccer, and he was so excited to get his trophy! I am excited we dont have to wake up early on Saturdays for games any more!
I had a great mothers day! I was able to go to brunch with my friends and then we went and got pedicures, such a treat! Then on Sunday we got to talk to my little brother Zach who is on his Mission in Paraguay.... that is the last time we get to talk to him before he comes home! I really miss him!
We go swimming a lot--- summer is in full swing here... we have already had several days above 105 degrees.
My little sister Jessica came to visit and we had fun seeing them. I am glad the are moving down here.
Oh yeah, My sister-in-law Andrea (Jeff's wife), is Pregnant! that is really exciting!

I promise to update more this month... I actually have more I want to say, but my babies need me.

love.

Earth Day!

2009-04-22T08:29:00.000-07:00

I wish my camera worked because it is only 8:30 Am and Beckham and I have already done a lot. (Scarlett was sleeping for most of it.)

We made Sugar cookies (I promised him we would make them last night after Scarlett was asleep but I also fell asleep. And so he woke up bright and early to make them this morning) and decorated them with things from the earth: The actual earth, A tree, A peacock, a flower and an airplane, all per his request.

Then I bought cute little plants to plant with the kids, I planted chives and each of them got to plant sunflowers. I am excited to see them grow and they are very excited about watering them.

Today has the makings of being a very long day, but probably a pretty good one!:)

Good Morning!

Spidey and The Bat

2009-04-15T16:23:00.001-07:00

Here is Batman and Scarlie at the Skirball museum in CA, they were doing a comic book exhibit and had this set up for the kids, There was a sign that actually said "No Photography" I guess we showed them!

This is a picture from our Ca trip. Beckham as Batman (or Badman as he calls him) and Eric as Spiderman! These two boys were a handful, but we had fun!

Lamenting a little...

2009-04-09T23:27:00.000-07:00

Okay so I believe in Child-led weaning. Or Natural weaning as LLL calls it. And am very committed to the process. But on Saturday, we went to a Birthday party for Corey's best friends, girlfriends, son (got that?) and I Nursed Scarlett there, just like I would anywhere... except I felt weird, like I was offending people (not that I care or would chose their feelings over my daughters), but it made me sad. This is the first time I have felt this way. I think it is because I don't know these people, but they are not strangers either... you know? they are people from Corey's previous life, people he knows, but I don't. When it is in public with strangers I will never see or speak to again, I haven't even given it a second thought. Or when it is people (at church, ha.) that I know are looking at me like I am crazy woman for nursing my toddler, I don't care. They think I am crazy, I know I am right, (ha). But with these people, in this situation, I felt weird. And I feel bad about it. Why does society judge so harshly, a woman who is doing what is natural? doing what the rest of HUMANITY has done for ages? I don't know where I am going with this, I just needed to get it out there... I like to pretend I have a thick skin, that what people think doesn't effect me. But it does, a little. And I wanted to put into words how I was feeling.

what do you think?

My sister has a lot of insight in this area (she is a bit of a role model to me), maybe I should just call her.

It is probably a trick.

2009-04-09T23:19:00.000-07:00

But...
Scarlett went pee on the potty today-- like 6 times and Had a dry diaper all day--- also, she went poo on the potty, then asked to call daddy and tell him--- he was so proud, haha.
But, like I said before, I think it is a trick, I don't believe she is actually potty-trained (first of all I haven't trained her yet, hahah, and secondly she is only 20months old TODAY!) We will see where we go from here.

(still no camera... still no pictures.)

I love this picture!

2009-04-07T10:22:00.000-07:00

One of my best friends and me, with our babies. (in carriers)

It was so fun hanging out with Laurisa while we werein CA and so fun to meet her newest little guy Rowan. I miss them! Beckahm does too, except he calls her Marrisa.

so sorry,

2009-03-31T16:42:00.000-07:00

I am sorry I haven't post almost all month. My camera is broken again--- and blog post just aren't the same without pictures.
SO here is a list of what we have been up to.

Went to LA, to visit, a fun, yet challenging trip. I was really happy to see Laurisa and hang out with her... if she sends me some pics of us I will post them--- My little Sister came out too, and it was fun staying up late talking and laughing but it was hard when the kids (our two boys) would fight.
We go to the park almost everyday.
Scarlett goes on the potty a lot now, she is no where near potty trained but she loves going and I think the cloth diapers really help her realize she is wet.
Corey's Grandfather passed away, and that was very sad, but his grandma got to come out here and spend 3 weeks, and it has been fun getting to know her.
Beckham started Soccer, and has played just one game. It is very entertaining to watch 3-year-olds play soccer!

I cant think of anything else, but we have been keeping busy and having fun, this is the best time of year here, the weather is beautiful and we have been having a lot of fun hanging out with our friends and family.

Hopefully I will get a new camera here shortly.

Quick Update

2009-03-04T06:44:00.000-08:00

We are finally all better--- well I have thrush, but compared to the last month of illnesses, we are better. WOOT!

Beckham, Scarlett and I are leaving this morning to go to L.A. I am supper excited, we are staying with my sister Satci and we are also going to spend a few days with one of my Best friends from High school, Laurisa!

I just want to post something, since I wont be for a while.

Love!

The Family Bed.

2009-02-12T15:36:00.000-08:00

Bedsharing: The practice of sleeping in an adult bed with ones' child. (A strong instinct I felt early on in this mothering evolution.)

(Corey and Scarlett)

(Me and Beckham)

Pro's:

Ideal for infant to maintain body tempeture.
Effects the infants Braincell-connections, calorie absorbtion, breathing, sleep/arousal patterns, and heart rate.
Crucial for optimal breastfeeding
Allows mother to sleep more.
Makes me happy.
Very happy.

Con's:

When one of your babies (Scarlett) Has the flu and unexpectedly throws up in the night. (Everyone has to be cleaned.) HA! (Although this actually could be a pro... could you imagine if she had thrown-up and she wasnt close by? how long till I would have figured it out... till she woke up in a full scream? She didnt even cry once that night (or any night, really) because I picked her up, and comforted her immediately.)

( The family-- minus me-- who is taking this picture.)

So I have been living with a bunch of Sickies--- well really just one, Scarlett started throwing up late Saturday night she stopped the next morning, and has been well ever since. But, Corey on the other hand, had to go to the urgent care on Sunday because of a throbbing headache and neck pain--- turns out, it was PNEUMONIA!!! Weird! So he has been home sick all week. I am getting Cabin fever, we went to our Music class today at the park and that helped some, As much as I love my husband I really need him to get better and GO BACK TO WORK!

HA! HA! HA!

But seriously. I am losing it here. Our little daily routines we have are being disrupted.

We love you Corey, but please, get well!

whew... this has been a tiring week, and that family bed is looking mighty comfy right now.

Some interesting facts on Bedsharing, Read if this is something you would like to move toward.

"Although solitary infant sleep has become normal, even required, in many western cultures, it is actually a recent culturally unique phenomenon. In western Cultures, bedsharing between a mother and a nursing baby (usually up to two years old) was standard practice until around 150 years ago. However, this shift to solitary sleep has not been a global phenomenon-- worldwide, mother-infant cosleeping is still widespread. "

"Night-time mother infant proximity in the sleep environment facilitates a variety of positive bio-behavioral experiences for the infant as well as for the mother herself." "While it remains speculative to say that solitary infant sleep is stressful to human infants, a variety of researchers have demonstrated that short-term separations of nonhuman primate infants from their mothers lead to an array of potentially life-threatening physiological changes such as adrenal-cortisol surges, immune dysfunction, and breathing abnormalities. We know very little about the extent to which human infants experience stress when left completely alone for extended periods of time, as it is difficult to get ethical approval for such a research design, which represents a potentially dangerous, traumatic, or otherwise unsettling event for infants. However, Dr. Megan Gunnar and colleagues have shown that when nine-month-old infants are left to in a room with a relatively inattentive adult, they indeed experience a physiological stress response similar in pattern to that that experienced by nonhuman primates infants."

Beck-isms

2009-01-23T09:12:00.000-08:00

One day I was getting frustrated with the kids, (because I wasn't interacting with them..) and I say out loud:
m: Beckham, Maybe I am just a hypocrite.
B: (looks at me funny and says) No, I think your a crocodile.

Another time he was trying to talk me into making Jello. (I didn't want to make it because I don't like it and I know that he doesn't like it.) He then tells me; "Mom I love jello I haven't had it in forever, I used to eat it all the time when I was a boy." (BTW, I made it, and he hated it.)
He also will often tell me things like: "When I was a Grown Up..." or "When I was a girl..." or "When I was a dad..."

And when we have more kids he wants to name the boy BlueBerry and the girl Strawberry.

Wedding & Retirement

2009-01-22T12:32:00.000-08:00

Wedding:

Jeff and Andrea Got married on December 30th.

She looked beautiful in her dress!

I had fun with my sisters.

The temple sealing was beautiful.

Good times all around.

(Jeff and Andrea just outside the temple doors.)

Retirement:
My Dad retired from the Air force, this past weekend.
He was in for 28 years.
Only Active Duty for 4 (maybe 6)
He retired as a Lt.Col. (that is 2 away from General)
We all went down to Tucson to attend the ceremony.
It was a lot of fun, My dads family came too.
One of the nights Beckham woke up with a bloody nose and the bed looked like a murder scene. I still don't really know why he had a bloody nose.

( this is Davis-Monthan AF base. They have a bone yard of all the old planes that are no longer used by the military. My dad took us on a tour of the planes, where we were able to get up really close to them, etc.)( I actually think this picture above is of Planes that were used to carry nuclear weapons that have to be disassembled as part of the cold war treaty, so that the Russians can take satellite images of these.)

HO! HO! HO!

2008-12-26T15:05:00.000-08:00

Scarlett Time

2008-12-22T13:55:00.001-08:00

She is seriously THEE most beautiful girl. ever. But I didnt have to tell you that.

Mommy and babies.

2008-12-21T13:30:00.000-08:00

Daddy with babies

2008-12-19T08:09:00.001-08:00

These are some of my favorites from our photo shoot.

awe.

Suite Day

2008-12-15T22:19:00.000-08:00

Here we are at the Suns game friday... Terrible Picture, some random cheerleader girl came around taking photos of people in the box. So here we are... looking terrible... but the picture is free and this is my outlet for photos.
Enjoy.

Also, they made me chose a cheesy frame to put around it. ha.

December 10th

2008-12-14T17:10:00.000-08:00

Just 25 years old today!
(okay so I know this is late, but I was busy, cut me some slack)

My birthday this year was one of the best I have had in a while! We Celebrated with my Family on the 9th because my dad and brother were going to be out of town on the 10th. Here is a run down of the 9th:

-We meet for Lunch at Pappadeaux's (MMMMMMMM, that pretty much sums it up)
-Corey, Beckham, Scarlett and I went Hiking. It was soo nice! Beckham and Corey ran the whole way down the mountain, I did not, I was nursing Scarlett the whole way down in my Mei Tei front carrier.
-We went to my parents to have (ice cream) cake, and sing. That is when My brothers gave me the gifts they got me.... Josh (my loving and awesome older brother) got me a Wii (WHAT???? A Wii??? like a Nintendo wii? YES!!! I could not believe it either! What was he thinking!) That is WAY too generous! and Jeff my lovely Younger brother invited me to the Suns game with him that night, 5th row seats behind the visitors bench! SO MUCH FUN! And while we were there I won tickets to Friday nights game in a suite! WOOT!
-So then after singing to me, Scarlett and I went to the Suns game.
-Came home and I got My first birthday call from one of my Favorite people in the world, ABBIE and we talked into the wee hours of the morning like we used to in high school. I miss her! lots.

That was Tuesday, This was Wednesday, the 10th:

-A nice wake up call from my friend Mindy.
-A VERY sweet text message from my husband (that I continuously got through out the day with random sweet nothings)
-Then my mom and I (along with my children) met my Aunt Melanie and Grandad for lunch at Oregano's (solely for the amazing desserts they have there). That was good fun, and lots of Laughs.
-On the way home we stopped at Sprinkles (4 to celebrate that night with my small little family) the best cupcakes in the WORLD!
-we also stopped at the train park. I love the train park and so do the kids. That was fun!
-We came home and I chatted with my Sister for a while while the kids napped, I love her!
-Corey came home with flowers in hand and then we played the Wii for a bit and then went out to eat with the fam.

It was such a nice birthday (two days). I felt very loved and happy.
Thank you EVERYONE who made my birthday special!

And my Favorite gift: The photos I got from the photography session with Wendy at Blue Lily!

(these are just a few more from that session. I will post more!)

Therapy.

2008-12-08T17:34:00.000-08:00

Wow, that felt good.

I know I have mentioned before how my birth with Scarlett has left me feeling angry, sad, bitter, used, traumatized, et cetera. Well I got an email from the Natural child blog, so I meander over to their site to see what is going on, (they said I could win an ergo) So anyways they have a side bar link to The Birth Survey. I decide to take it. Yearning to tell my story to someone who can actually effect change, I took the survey.

I feel HEARD.
I feel Justified.
I want to watch them read my story and be as horrified as I am by it, (although I am sure they have heard the gamut, our maternal health care system NEEDS HELP!).

Anyways, I wanted to put the word out there that this survey exists, and for all women who have given birth to go take it, hospital go-ers and homebirthers alike...
WE NEED CHANGE! so let us help!

At least one good thing came out of my experience: (no thanks to the hospital staffers, at all!)

(that is right folks, I got my pictures back from Blue Lily, prepare to be BOMBARDED!)

They said...

2008-11-25T21:45:00.001-08:00

...to post this link and I would get an extra entry to win 20 pairs of Babylegs! My favorite baby accessory!
so here's the link! WIN BABYLEGS!

(here we are 'pretending to be asleep' {a strange family tradition} this is the first picture I found of Scarlett wearing her 'legs... I am tired and don't want to spend time to find a better pic.)

Photo Friday

2008-11-21T08:03:00.000-08:00

Edition: Scarlett's Favortite thing, aka boo-uh (that is wht she calls it).

We love nursing!

Award and Halloween Pics

2008-11-14T07:42:00.000-08:00

Okay so Erica over at One Busy Mama gave me this award! I have never gotten a blog award! (I also dont really think I have heard of them, ha.) But I am excited she picked me because Erica is someone I really look up to. She is a Wonderful person! I really do love her!

So I am gonna pass the award on to:

Olivia

Okay So then My Mommies Group had a Halloween Party, and I just got some pictures from there. So I thought I would share them since I didnt get any of my own.

The UPS guy having lunch.

Scarlett with our Friend Bella (this was after the Costume parade, and on to the tote bag decorating, no costume for Scar)

Scarlet and our friend Hiedi

This is Hadleigh, cute... but the picture is here cause you can see Scarlett in her costume in the background... A sweet princess!

Beckham painting his bag... by the time he was done painting there was so much paint that we couldnt get the bag open. ha.

My camera is broken...

2008-11-10T21:50:00.000-08:00

... that is why I havent been blogging.

here is a list of what we've been up to:

lots of park days! (the weather is finally cool enough to go to the park again!)
Halloween (Becks was the UPS guy and Scarlett was a princess, my dad took pictures, but I havent recieved them yet. Scarlett was into the whole trick-or-treating thing, and was dragging her bucket along the ground by the end of it. Beckham, on the other hand, would not accept candy from anyone. ha.)
Scarletts hair is GROWING! I can actually do piggie tails now!
We sold our car! Hooray!!!
We got our pictures taken by a professional... BlueLily, it was a shot in the dark that we got the appointment with her, and the session went ok(sort of terrible actually, not her fault, but my lovely 3-year-old was somewhat of a challenge)... so we are having faith that the pictures will be great...
Scarlett is learning her colors. (Halloween candy is very helpful with that!)
I have the most generous In-laws. Ever.

Boring.

Just felt a need to update.

love.

His Namesake...

2008-10-21T19:25:00.001-07:00

This is an outfit Corey got Beckham during the 2006 world cup. It is an England David Beckham uniform (size 7/8, I believe). (My) Beckham asked for the Mohawk. Ha. I thought it was pretty cute.

Also, pardon the mess... not my top priority.

Scars, Carks, Carlie, Scarlino, etc

2008-10-14T10:08:00.000-07:00

At an event Scarlett and I went to, there was professional photographer taking pictures. She took these of me and my baby girl.

What the...?!?!?!

2008-10-07T15:41:00.000-07:00

Last Wednesday I was having an okay day, I talked to my Mother-in-law on the phone for a while then I talked to one of my best friends Abbie for a long time, and while on the phone with her I heard helicopters close and police sirens but didn't really think anything of it. About 5 minutes after getting off the phone with her, and I got a call from Corey. The call went something like this:

Corey: Do you know whats going on down here?

Me: No, somethings going on?

Corey: IT. IS. UNBELIEVABLE.

Me: I am coming down now!

I rush down with the kids in tow, and here is what we see...

That's right, a CAR IN THE POOL!!!

After seeing all this, (or rather, as soon as seeing all this) I start asking anyone who will listen to me a million questions, I eventually find out who was in the car, It was this woman below. (She looks like a spectator, huh? I was expecting a soaking-wet-mess-of-emotions person somewhere, but no, not these people.. they looked like they really couldn't care any less about what happened. I had WAY more emotion about what happened than they did. And THEY had just driven over a fence, into a pool, where someone broke their window, and according to the man who did it, were pulled out by their hair... and there they stand looking like spectators at their totaled car.)

You can kinda see the her pants are a little wet on the bottom, that is it!!!

The Police...

..who, after the car was out asked 'the couple' to get their registration and insurance out of the soaking wet glove box. Ha.
After the couple watched their car leave on the tow-truck, they walked calmly to their apartment. WEIRD!
At least Beckham got something out of it... One of the officers gave Becks some badges. She was a Female Motorcycle cop, Beckham couldn't believe it.

Whew, what a day!

My PSA (Public Service Announcement)

2008-10-04T21:56:00.000-07:00

Do you wanna be a better parent, Sure we all do... ( Remember that infomercial where that woman says... Do you wanna make more money? sure.....) HAH!

Well this month is International Attachment Parenting Month!

What is Attachment parenting?
Well according to wikipedia, it is: a phrase coined by pediatrician William Sears, is a parenting philosophy based on the principles of the attachment theory in developmental psychology. According to attachment theory, a strong emotional bond with parents during childhood, also known as a secure attachment, is a precursor of secure, empathic relationships in adulthood.

According to me, it is: Following my instincts as a Mother, the very first thing I felt STRONGLY about as a mom, was co-sleeping, I even did it in the hospital with Beckham and I remember being scolded by the nurses, but I continued it because it felt right. From there things just progressed, I didnt even know that the way I parented, or the things I instinctively knew as a mom, was an actual thing that other people did as well, and it had a name.... until I ran into Dr. Sears' books, and website. So in a nut shell AP to me is to Co-sleep (which we actually have a family bed now), to Breastfeed ( and allow for child lead weaning...), Baby-wearing (almost a neccesity when you have more than one, I dont know how I would do anything with out wearing scarlett most of the time), Following babies/childs cues (nurse on demand, pick up/ comfort child when upset, or needs attention, face to face interaction during awkae time, etc). That is all that I can think of right now...

Dr Sears said; (at the LLL conference where I heard him speak live) That you can still be an attachment parent if you dont breastfeed, or if you dont practice co-sleeping or baby-wearing, but you cannot be an Attachment parent if you dont Respond to your childs cries/needs.

This topic is close to my heart, something I feel a lot of passion about. Afterall we are all just raising little adults, and dont we want them to be the best adults they can be?

Well click on that link up there, or here , they are giving you ideas on things you can do to be more attached this month, they are calling them " Child Presence" ( like presents.. get it...) They are actually really great and cute Ideas to do with your kids... easy things too.... things that make you feel like, you are a good mom, despite all the time you (I actually mean, me) goof up and get irritated or annoyed or angry with your kids. Try it!

Road Trip!! (corey and rachel style...)

2008-09-29T22:39:00.000-07:00

We went on our wards camp out last weekend ( or maybe the weekend before that...) and after that we decided to head up to Flagstaff. It is typical of Corey and I to take a long time to get anywhere, and on road trips we are notoriously slow... we stop too much... enjoy ourselves, take our time... Here is the weekend we had.

After camping, we started driving up to Flagstaff, and on our way there we ran into the Yavapai county fair. It was a lot of fun, we watched a Tractor pull, and the kids rode rides. They both loved them! After the Fair we made our way up to Flag and stayed in one of the only hotels that had a room... Then We hung out that day in Flagstaff and then Drove home...

Hope you enjoyed the pictures, the layout is all weird, and I don't really know how to fix it... oh well...

It was a lot of fun, and both the kids loved it, they are pretty good little road trip companions.

Scarlies Birthday Party

2008-09-23T08:55:00.001-07:00

We finally had Scarlett's First birthday party, it took us forever because I wanted all our family to be in town for it (even thought my aunt was gone, at least her family could come).

We went to Corey's Parents house and we went swimming and had Chick-fil-a (my favorite).

The theme was sopposed to be pink...

Me and my big girl.

Little princess.

Uncle Josh and Scarlett.

Meadow, Papa Greg, and Beckham

The cake, (I did a lot of candles, scarlett loves candles).

7 years ago...

2008-09-11T13:38:00.001-07:00

Can you believe it has really been that long?

I really can't.

Words

2008-09-07T16:25:00.001-07:00

Another inspiring day.

2008-09-01T22:41:00.000-07:00

I was fortunate enough to attend another Exciting day. I went to Birth on Labor Day, it was a play and a birth fair. The play was very powerful. It was about several woman and their individual birth stories. I was so touched by the play, it was so moving, I went with my mom and I even saw her wiping her eyes every so often, (I, generally, cry easily).
It made me think and rethink about the births of my 2 children.... I Still to this moment have never written Scarlett's down. I have never wanted to relive it. I couldn't even talk about it after it happened, I cant even speak openly about it to people, now. It was very traumatic for me. It took months for me to even talk a little about it with out crying, and Just recently I have stopped being angry about it. The thing is though, (and I have always acknowledged this) is that, the birth I had with Scarlett would not had been so traumatic for other women, I just wanted something, something more, I wanted to be somewhere I couldn't afford to be, I wanted people to attend that didn't attend, I expected the people that did attend to act differently. Everything was what it shouldn't have been.
Birth is my passion, My favorite thing to talk about, The thing I feel the most about. I know I was put on the earth to help other women, I AM going to be a Midwife. It sort of consumes me.
But, since Scarlett's birth, I have had reservations, not about wanting to help other women, but of wanting to do it myself. I tear up when I think about it.
The First glimpse of hope I have had; the first time I thought that I could face a birth of my own again, was when I watched " The Business of Being Born" When I saw one mother catching her own baby and discovering the sex of her baby for the first time. What a Romantic thing!!! I COULD DO THAT! Since then I have been trying to heal myself, so that I would and could be ready if I ever were to have anymore children. Then, today after watching this play. I finally feel open, I feel justified in saying my birth was traumatic (even though it could have been a thousand times worse.)
I don't really know where I am going with this, I really just think I needed to type out how I have been feeling. Since I have been so closed about my experience, it feels all muffled inside of me... I really should write it down, I just fear I would sensor myself so that I wouldn't have to relive the things that really enraged me.
I guess I am using this as an outlet... Probably not the best place to spill my thoughts on this matter but they were overflowing and this is the medium that caught them.

It's late.

help me sort through this... what do you think???

When a 3-year old dresses themselves:

2008-08-26T10:01:00.000-07:00

This must include:

A Helmet,

Your sisters babylegs,

and some sort of sporting equipment.

VERY STYLISH!

Becks Guitar Party.

2008-08-20T15:28:00.000-07:00

So, for Beckhams 3rd birthday party, I just wanted to do something small, I was actually planning to take him and a few friends to a baseball game. But about a week before the game, he started insisting on having a guitar party. In Beckham's words: " I want to play the guitar and the drums and you sing." Meaning he wanted to play Rockband for his birthday. Easy enough.

I took out the Halloween box and sprayed all the kids hair with colored hairspray, and I put some black eyeliner on Becks, just for effect, haha.

Here are some pictures. We only had family come so the people you see are My Aunt Melanie and here family. And My sister-in-law Kristy and her family. (Actually I dont know if I added any pics of them...???)

This is Scarlett and Jamison. ( I took one of Beckham's old shirts and cut it, to make a cool rock star shirt for her.)
Jamison, Beckham, and Carlie. ( Look at beckham trying to figure out how to do his fingers like them, hahah such a funny picture.)
Those 3 again.
Beckham playing with one of his presents.

The guitar cake I made. Impressed? Me too, hahah

We had a lot of fun, Ric, My brother-in-law plays the drums in real life and so he was Really really good at the drums ion the game, so it was really cool to watch him play. I love singing!! And the kids just loved that we let them play as much as they wanted.

That's All.

Love you.

What an inspiring weekend!!!

2008-08-18T16:24:00.000-07:00

Robert W. Sears, MD, is a father of three, board-certified in Pediatrics, and a co-author in the Sears Parenting Library.

Just a little about Dr. Sears as a Doctor:

I have always been a slower-paced pediatrician. I love to sit and chat. I love to play with your kids. I love to give you the extra time you sometimes need to get your questions answered and your problems solved. I also like to think outside the box and blend a more natural, holistic approach with standard medicine. I focus on breastfeeding success, attachment parenting, safe and alternative vaccine schedules, creative approaches to infant sleep problems and toddler behavior challenges. I optimize nutritional health for families, limit the use of antibiotics and seek more natural ways to treat illnesses. That is who I am, and I know that is what you want.

So, this weekend I went to the LLL conference. What a great way to spend a Saturday, Scarlett in the carrier, happily playing and nursing at will, surrounded by other mom and baby teams like us, being nurtured in our own ways to see the potential we have as mothers. Reaffirming the things we intuitively know to be correct. Remembering that I am not some 'out there' parent with wild philosophies. (Or, really, that I am one of those moms, but being 'out there' is far better than any other sort of parenting. ::Smile::)

Dr. Bob Sears was one of the the Key-note speakers. His first lecture was on Vaccines. It was so informative, it didn't change my mind, he really just confirmed that my intuition is in tact. And his second lecture was on The Science Behind Attachment Parenting. He basically showed all the scientific research that proved that children who are the product of attached parents are pretty much leaps and bounds ahead of other children in all aspects of their life, including (but not limited to): IQ, socialization, self -esteem, Emotional intelligence, etc.
"Co-sleeping babies grow up with a higher self-esteem, less anxiety, become independent sooner, are better behaved in school , and are more comfortable with affection. They also have less psychiatric problems."{source}
He is a very balanced man. All the things he says, ring true. He would only list things or show studies that were published by major medical journals and well respected research agencies. He said that he even tried to find information that existed to counter his findings, but could find no such study to support the opposite.
My Favorite quote by him on Saturday was: “The single most important influence of a child’s intellectual development is the responsiveness of the mother to the cues of her baby.”

Okay, so the speaker that I went to in between the two Sears sessions, was "Teach your child to read" And this was the most inspirational thing I have ever been to. I am not kidding, it changed my life. I had such a strong powerful feeling while I was there.

I Realized something that seems very basic and simple. Something I probably have known all along but now I can think about it consciously. That my children, (the 2 I have now and the ones that are yet to come) came to me for a reason, I am supposed to be their mom, I know them the best, I receive inspiration on their behalf. It is my obligation to do what is best for these people. To make the decisions they cannot make for themselves right now. They are unique. And as their mother I need to only look out for them. Even (Especially) if that means that we do things differently. Who wants to be a 'middle of the road' kind of person anyway. To nurture their unique gifts and talents, let them bloom to their highest potential. To show them that they are the people I know they are. Or even better, enable them to discover that for themselves.

I cant explain what clicked. But I can tell you that I know that things in the Flynn Family are going to be beyond what I thought they ever could be. My kids are amazing, I am so lucky to be their mom and I am even luckier that I get to watch them become adults.

I am just so grateful, and sooo excited for the future!

some more quotes:

"Dr. Rao and colleagues at the National Institutes of Health showed that infants with prolonged crying (but not due to colic) in the first 3 months of life had an average IQ 9 points lower at 5 years of age. They also showed poor fine motor development."

"Researchers have found babies whose cries are usually ignored will not develop healthy intellectual and social skills."

Just 3 years old today!

2008-08-14T08:54:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday! Just 3 years old today!

My baby in utero

Just a couple minutes old
Getting to know my baby.

Daddy and Becks in the Hospital

Awe!

Becks with his Cousins: Olivia and Eric

So Cute!

Bathtime at around 4 months old

He always wakes up in good mood in the morning.

Wearing Tattoo sleeves on his legs.

An early Suns fan.

Taking his baby for a ride.

He is so cute!

Getting into mommy's make-up!!

He used to do this for hours. He would put the key in the lock and then lock and unlock the door. Still to this day he locks the Door when we leave and unlocks it when we come home.

Trying out his sisters Carseat.

Rocking at Christmas.

I dont know why, but I love this picture.

Awe they Match!

He actually is the best big brother.

I had to add this one, it shows what a goofy person he is. He has the funniest sense of humor.

Nursing his baby!

Looking cool in their glasses.

My silly Nino.

Riding the giraffe.

It is amazing how fast time goes. I cant believe he is 3. I cant believe I have only been a mom for 3 years. I love my little man. He is so smart and fun. I totally enjoy his company. He is starting preschool in a few weeks, I will miss him so much and I am sure Scarlett will too.

We love you Becks! You are the greastest!

My baby girl is One!

2008-08-12T06:26:00.000-07:00

The Day she was born

about 3 months old

Around 6 months old

Around 9 months

Around 11 months

Well on the 9th, she turned one. And I feel really sad about it. I didnt feel this way as Becks grew but I feel so sad that Scarlett isnt my baby anymore.

A list of this that make her Wonderful beyond measure...

She laughs a lot.

She will copy any thing you say. (pretty smart)

She LOVES to hug people, esp. Beckham.

She nods Yes all the time, about everything.

While driving, if she is asleep, She will wake up when she hears a song she likes and starts dancing. ( Like yesterday, she woke up for Viva la Vida by Coldplay)

She Loves Beckham, and I mean LOves him, she can say his name, and whenever he is near her, that is all she is saying and she is trying to tackle him to hug him.

One word she has been saying for months, Tucca, (not a real word, but it is the cutest thing when she says it!!!)

She is seriously beautiful.

She loves to read. Books are my go-to toy when she is upset.

She has the best skin. (and I dont know where she got it from)

She loves to eat. (Breast milk, and table food, she loves it all.)

I could go on and on. I really love this Bean of mine. Like, I am literally in love with her. I am so blessed and excited to be her mom, and I am excited to see what the future holds with her. (hopefully some more hair, haha)

Happy Birthday Baby Girl, We love you!!!!

Pictures from a Vacation

2008-08-06T09:48:00.001-07:00

UGH

2008-07-28T18:53:00.000-07:00

I have been tryiong to upload hese pictures for 2 days now. ANd Blogger for some reason wont let me.... UGH!
Just know that pictures are coming, and let that be enough for now.

love.

Happy Anniversary

2008-07-01T08:35:00.000-07:00

Today is Mine and Corey's Anniversary!

Here are some pictures of when we were dating and one of our wedding day.

Our First Valentines Day

A trip to Missiouri

On the Golden Gate Bridge

Right before A Dave Matthews Concert

I love you Corey!

I am excited for all the years to come!

woot!

2008-06-30T13:12:00.000-07:00

Thanks Erica for sharing this on your site! I love my Moby, my Beco, and my mei tei... Here are 2 pics of me in my MobyD, I dont have any now of my mei tei or my beco but I will get some and post them. I am a big, I mean BIG believer in baby-wearing and this was a life-saver when Scar was tiny.

Win the Essential Babywearing Stash from Along for the Ride (one Beco Butterfly, one Hotsling baby pouch, one BabyHawk Mei Tai, one Zolowear Ring Sling, and one Gypsy Mama Wrap)

Visiting Family

2008-06-28T08:24:00.000-07:00

This past week Jessica came to visit us with her family. It was a lot of fun hanging out with her. Her daughter Avery and Scarlett played so well together. I loved watching them interact. We miss you Jessica!

Scarlett and Avery (Avery is so over it.)

on a tiny chair together

Both Girls with my cousin Jamison

Becks being cute as ever.

Beckham on the Giraffe at the Marry-go-round at the mall. He LOVES giraffes, and was talking about riding it since we had gotten to the mall. but then he found out it was a stable animal (it didn't go up and down) He was really disappointed and was angry with his giraffe. Ha, I thought it was funny.

For Papa Greg's Birthday we went to a Diamondbacks game.

Scarlett and my cousin Adrienne.

Today we are going over to Corey's parents house to swim! They have been building this pool since last summer and it is finally done!!! We are soooo excited!!!

Leave us a comment, let us know how you are!

Love!

Walking Scar

2008-06-14T14:08:00.000-07:00

I got some video of Scar walking. Read the earlier post on more of what happend since I last posted.

Missing Time...

2008-06-14T13:42:00.001-07:00

... in pictures...

My aunt and her family moved down here and we went out to help her move, not much help was done. It the picture we see My mom, Melanie (my aunt), her daughter Carlie, and The back of my Dad.

The tower Beckham built with the blocks Grandma Debbie got him.

Scarlett Cute as Ever riding a motorcycle. She also learned to walk 2 weeks ago, she took her first steps all on her own accord, she was playing, and I was sitting on the couch, next thing I knew, she walked over to see me. I was Shocked!! She is getting good, she already prefers walking to crawling so it wont be long before she only walks! And she just turned 10 months on the 10th!

And then this one of the both of them, playing in my jogging stroller. They are starting to be such good friends I love it! The other day they were playing in their room and Beckham comes out and says, "Mom, Scarlett wont crawl through the cornfield with me." hahaha I guess he imagines for the both of them. But I am really starting to see the pay off of all the hard work I have put in being a mom to these two energetic kids. I love them sooo much!

I will update sooner next time.

Love.

That Becks

2008-06-03T12:44:00.001-07:00

So I just wanted to share a couple of cute things Beckham said to me this past week.

It was(is) really hot out here, and we had been running a million errands so I thought we would stop at sonic to get a drink. So I ask Beck what he wants and this is how the conversation went:

Beck: Diet Coke
Me: Diet Coke???
B: Yeah.
Me: what about a Cherry Limeaid
B: No, that hurts my nose.
Me: Hurts your nose? what do you mean?
B: You know, I have a Brain in my head, and it is frozen.

APperantly he is talking about Brainfreeze. hahahah

So then last night we we at my Le Leche League meeting at the Library, and outside some people had set up huge ( I mean huge) telescopes for people to look at stars, so after the meeting me and Beckham (and scar) went to take a look. Beckham started calling tem spotting scopes, hahah I just thought that was such a cute term for them, hahah...

okay sorry, those stories are probably boring to you guys but I think he is so cute, he is turning into a little adult. hahah okay, not really but he seems so old now!

love.

I was Tagged!!!

2008-05-22T12:22:00.000-07:00

Erica Tagged me... I have never done this before so here it goes...

1. What was I doing 10 years ago?
So I was what? 14? Man, I must have just finished the 8th grade, My best Friends Were Abbie and Jenny and Laura and Tara. I was just hanging out and being a teenager.... nothing spectacular.

2. What were five things on my "to-do" list today?
Umm... I dont have to-do lists... I worked out this morning with my trainer. We went and got breakfast after that, and then while I fed Scar and becks read book I caught up on my tivo-d shows. Ummm... we might go to the outlet mall later, but I am not sure... I am not really a planner type of person... we just go with the flow.

3. Snacks I enjoy:
Brownies are my fav. I also love Hummus for a snack, and Feta cheese.

4. Things I would do if I were a Billionaire:
Oh man! WHat I wouldnt do.... This is one of Corey's and Mine favorite things to fantasize about together... our house would be sustainable (like Erica), with a huge yard, with animals.... probably not in AZ (too hot) I would want my family close so I might buy them all house close so that we could be. I would want to start a birth center that is affordable and helpful.. to give women more choices. I could go on and on... If only....

5. Places I have lived:
Really? OKay...
Stanford NC
San Antonio, TX
Cinncinati, OH
West Covina CA
Lahabra CA
Oakdale CA
Germantown TN
Gilbert AZ
West Jordan UT
Layton UT
Glendale AZ
Scottsdale AZ
Phoenix AZ
and that is only the Major moves... there are a few others in there that I lived for a short time...

6. People I've tagged:
Valorie
(I would tag Abbie, but she just had a baby.)

Offcial Update

2008-05-21T12:54:00.000-07:00

Here it is. The official update, of why I havent been around or posting... Our home flooded! Ugh, I know. What a stinky situation. My Washer broke, well the hose on the back broke and all the water went every about 2ish inches of water throughout the house. nothing really importnant got ruined, lubkily, but we had to move out for a week. We stayed at my parents house, and it actually was a lot of fun. It was fun having my brother Josh as a roomate, and fun having the big backyard to play in. The kids love it there. We are back in our apartment now, and it was hard getting it all back to normal... I dont even think we are there yet...

Oh and Staci had her baby, Conrad Douglas Heder, he weighed 10lb 4oz. Both him and Stace are doing well... She ended up with a c-section at the last minute (He was breech but the doc was gonna let her deliver vaginally, but he would budge... it turned out he was huge!) So she is healing from that. But He is here and healthy and in the end that is what counts. I love my sister!

And here are some pictures of Scar and Beck at my parents house.

And Scar LOVES uncle josh, she gets so excited every time he is around.

And Again, Congrats to Abbie and fam.

love.

Mother's Day

2008-05-21T06:48:00.001-07:00

On mother's day we went to my mom's house and got to talk to my brother Zach who is on a mission. They only get to call home twice a year and mother's day is one of them, (christmas is the other). It was good talking to him, I really miss him. He and I became good friends before he left and I miss having him here to talk to. I know that he is where he is sopposed to be, and where he wants to be. I just miss him.

For Mother's Day Corey ordered me these really special brownies (my vice). And he gave me a really sweet card. And then Beckham also got me a sweet card. So I had a pretty good day.

So here are some pictures of the kiddos at my moms house on mothers day:

Beckham telling Papa "Happy Mother's Day"

Scarley getting into things like always.

posing for Papa

And our make-shift walkers... Beckham learned to walk also pushing grandma's stools around the house.

LOVE to all.

and Congrats to Abbie who just had her baby girl! You will love it! I promise!

Cousins

2008-05-20T09:05:00.000-07:00

Sorry it has taken so long to update... I will give the long update in a bit, But for now here are some pictures of Beckham with his cousins Meadow and Mateo.

Teeter-totter at Grandma's house

Meady

The kids in Grandmas bed watching a show together.

Becks is really so lucky to have 2 cousins his same age tha live close! They have so much fun together.

Just one of the Girls

2008-05-06T15:45:00.001-07:00

Becks, Sofia, Nina, Sarah, and Bella

They all got their toes painted today at our playdate.

So Pretty.

Sofia putting Lipstick on Beck

And here is a sweet pictrue of My Scarlett. She was eating Beckhams crumbs off the floor. It was Chocolate cookies... it was really cute while she did it. And cute afterward.

We would love to hear from you, leave comments and let us know what you guys are up to.

love.

Father-Sons & Mother-Daughters (hehe)

2008-05-03T18:39:00.000-07:00

Starting the camping trip... Beckham had a melt down about 3 minutes after this picture because he didnt want to go woth out me... he left in tears, And I ran upstairs and start bawling... I didnt want my little guy to be sad... Dont worry I called corey 5 minutes later and he was fine and excited to be going. Goodbyes are always hard!

They went on a boat! Corey says beckham LOVED it until they started going really fast, after that he acted like he was asleep.

Corey really wanted to go on the raft and Beckham would rather be with Corey on the raft than with a stranger on the boat. So here they are (with the bishops son, I think).

Then they got thrown off.... They said the water was freezing.

Beckham called me Last night while they were camping... At about 9:30, he told me about how pretty the stars were, and that the sun went into the earth. He asked me to call him when I got home (I was out with a friend) and he would say goodnight. He was so excited that he finally got to play with a hard baseball (I only let him use soft ones at home). He loved sleeping in the tent, and playing with all the boys.

when he ran into the house when he got home he says "Mom, I so missed you much."

I so missed you too Beckster!

Thanks Daddy for taking the boy. I needed that break! Scar and I had a ton of fun. We went out to Eat with some friends and then walked around the outdoor mall and hung out in Barnes and Nobles till it closed. This morning we went to our favorite breakfast place for some roasted veggie fritata, and then went shopping at Whole Foods.

All of us had a great weekend so far, we all just woke up from a family nap and now we are planning dinner, and tomorrow is church.

I feel refreshed.

Camping!!

2008-05-01T11:31:00.001-07:00

I am so excited Corey and Beckham are going on Father-sons camp out this weekend! I am excited to be alone (insert devilish laugh here) and I am also very excited for Becks he really looking forward to being with "no mommy, no Scarlett, just boys" as he says. They are gonna get to go out on the lake and just play and be boys with out mom making sure everyone is being safe. I think that is the great thing about dads. They get to be a little more laid back as parents, and I think the children really benefit from it.

Scar and I are probably gonna have a girls night, I really have been wanting to go see a movie... Luckily Scarlett is really good at movies, she just nurses and sits and watches it with me. I also think we might go on a picnic on Saturday. Cause Sat. is national Midwifery day and the midwives of AZ are having a picnic that day... so I thought that would be fun!

My sister is having her baby as I type this.. well maybe not 'as' I type but she is in labor... I am really excited for her and just keep praying that everything goes how she wants it.

I think I am gonna take the kids swimming today. Beckham has turned into this really brave kid since last simmer... HE was very timid of the water last summer... this year he jumps right in with his floaties on. You know those little tiles that say how deep a pool is? Well Becks asked me what it said on that... I told him it said 3 feet. So know he thinks he has to stand on that to be able to jump in. I hear him talking to himself: "feet go here..." hahah he takes things so literally... that is exactly how I was(still am).

I really want to learn how to french braid, not that Scar has any hair, but I want to be able to do it to my hair.... why wasn't that something every girl must learn in school.... dang, I hope I can figure it out before scar does get hair.

Okay sorry about the random-ness of this.
Love to all.

Good, Better, Best.

2008-04-27T22:45:00.000-07:00

I am here late at night, well late for me.. its almost 11. and I really should be reading my scriptures and writing in my journal... but instead on am online looking at diapers, and reading about breech birth.... Although those things are good things to do... there are better things I could be doing...

Melanie (my aunt) and her family are moving down here next month. I am really excited! She and I used to be really close, and I miss her a lot. Since she'll be closer now I hope that we can regain the friendship we once had.

My Brother Jeff is getting Married soon. That is super cool. I like his fiancee (they arent engaged yet, but will be soon) So it will add a new interesting and fun dynamic to the family to have her in our fam.

alright I better move on to the better things I could be doing...

love to all....

Becks..

2008-04-27T08:23:00.000-07:00

Okay he is sooo cute! We were driving the other day and he says to me:

Beckham: Mom do Frogs eat bugs?
Me: Do frogs eat bugs???
Beckham: Yeah?
Me: yes, they eat bugs.
B: thats gross, I no eat bugs.
Me: Thats what they eat for dinner. What do you eat for dinner?
B: Meaty meat, soy sauce, mashed matatoes.

Heheh I thought is was so cute... and apperantly he likes soy sauce for dinner, hahahah

alright... have to get the gang ready for church.
love.

Errands

2008-04-25T15:56:00.000-07:00

I still havent given anyone this link yet, so I am still only talking to myself. HA

Okay so Today we ran a trillion errands. Whist running them we got rear-ended... and then they guy Ran! He was in a Range Rover... what a jerk. I got his licsense plate though so I might tell on him, although there wasnt any damage, I kinda just want him to get a ticket for running.

We went to the Cloth diaper store here in town! IT was so exciting to see and feel all the different kinds of Diapers. I am really looking forward to that check from Pres. Bush so that I can buy more!

Umm, what else...

Oh Staci (my sister) is going to have her baby soon! Hopefully this weekend, she is have a Vaginal Breech baby. She was planning a home birth but her midwife would lose her liscence if she delivered a breech baby knowing it was breech... and she does, they told her she has to have a c-section... which is OUT of the question, so her midwife knows a doctor who will deliver a breech baby vaginally, but she has to be in the hospital. We are just praying she goes into labor soon because if the baby gets too much bigger the risks go up. What a frustrating situaton. Please pray.

ALright I am going to go Nurse my LuLuBear....

Inspired

2008-04-24T13:08:00.000-07:00

I decided to start one of these, I was inspired by my friends Abbie and Valerie. I thought this way I can better keep family and friends that are far away updated better on our lives. So since this is my first post I guess I will add pictures of us so people can see how cute we are. (HAH)

Scarlett(Born Aug 9th, 2007):

Okay so that didnt work.. for some reason it isnt letting me upload anymore pictures... but Becks Is adorable.. I am the same as always.. and Corey is handsome as always.... I will try again tomorrow and blab a little more.

Love.